Don't get frisked by the law

Vehicle citations are Not So Pretty, so contributing writer, Pretty Kim gave us all deets on how to get out of a ticket without being frisked by the law.

How To: Get out of a traffic citation, and score better parking free of tickets after 6 PM

In Los Angeles there are 527 miles of freeway and 382 miles of conventional highways. Every last mile of them are patrolled by traffic cops with nothing else better to do than give you a ticket. And when you DO get a ticket, you risk higher insurance premiums, headaches, and the possibility of getting runny eyeliner as you cry to get out of it. Here’s my guide to getting out of a ticket if you do get one and getting better ticket-free parking.

Use your cell phone camera to take a photo of the dashboard AND the clock in your car. As soon as you get pulled over, snap these photos, especially of the clock! If you camera phone logs the date and time of each photo, even better.
Why this works: When you contest your ticket, if the date or time is incorrect on the ticket, you can successfully challenge the ticket either in court, or via Trial-By-Mail or Trial-By-Declaration. Provided your ticket is for a simple infraction or moving violation, more likely than not, the judge will toss out your ticket! Simply print the photo, attach a copy of the picture to your statement as evidence.

Take a photo of your car ASAP after you get the violation.
Why this works: I successfully got out of a ticket when I noticed that the officer incorrectly indicated that my car was silver in color. My car is unmistakably bright white. Again, you can usually successfully contest your ticket with this technique. If the officer can’t even tell what color your car is, how can they tell if that really was you talking on your cell phone?

Request a trial in traffic court.
Why this works: Most officers are reluctant to go to court over small violations. For example, a HOV or carpool lane violation will run you about $450-600 plus fees. That’s serious scratch that I would rather not part with. Although you will still be required to pay the bail amount, odds are very much in your favor that your citing officer will not appear in court. Also, once your citation is dismissed, you get your money back in the mail, less a $10 processing fee. Less than 25% of citing officers appear in court for non-felony traffic cases.

Park in Yellow or Green Curb Zones after 6 PM.

Why this works: http://ladot.lacity.org/tf_Colored_Curb_Zones.htm

TIP:

Take Fountain Ave.

Why this works: Not the most direct route between Silverlake and West Hollywood, however, the LAPD seems to be much more interested in the goings on of Sunset and Santa Monica Boulevards during the day. If you’re OK with 4-way stops, Fountain is OK with you.

Tampons.
If you get pulled over by a cop for speeding, whip out a tampon and mention it's your time of the month, right here. Right now. And you urgently need to... ahem!Why this works: Male officers are still male and usually completely grossed out by periods, period. They don't really want to know what goes on in your no-no-zone. As a dude, they also want to avoid being on the receiving end of PMS. I mean, EW Listen, THIS WORKS VERY WELL VERY VERY WELL. No one else will know except you and the cop who is NOT issuing you a ticket.

Pretty orange jello shots

Today we're all about Pretty Drinks, I think we have a case of the Mondays over at Pretty Headquarters.

Sliced Orange Jello Shots

You will need:

• 6-10 tangelos (alternatively, you can use small oranges, or large tangerines)
• 1.25 cups of vodka
• 1.5 envelopes of Knox Gelatin (this is very important, no substitutes!)
• 1 large box of Jello (your pick on the flavor)
• 1/4 to 1/2 of a cup of Trader Joe's Cranberry Juice or Triple Berry Blend
• about 2 cups of boiling water.
• A cupcake tray

Step 1:

Slice the oranges in half, then juice the halves. Save about half of the fruit juice (about 1 cup) Be careful not to break through the orange skin when you juice them; these will become your jello-shot containers later on. Set them inside of the Cupcake tray.

Step 2:

Put about 4 cups of water in a pot on the stove, and boil. Once it's totally boiling, use about 1/4 of a cup of the BOILING water to dissolve 1.5 envelopes of Knox Gelatin in a small dish.

Step 3:

Pour about 2 cups of boiling water into a separate bowl. Mix in the Jello powder. Pour in your dissolved Knox Gelatin. Mix thoroughly with a whisk.

Step 4:

Pour in your Trader Joe's Juice. Pour in about a cup of the juice from the oranges (or tangerines, or tangelos). Mix well. If you dislike pulp, strain the juice before you add it.

Step 5:

Pour in your Vodka. MIX WELL.

Step 6:

Use a ladle to pour your jello shot mixture into your orange halves. Make certain the halves are level in the cupcake tray prior to pouring. Fill to the top as much as you can.

Step 7:

Gently ease your vodka shots into the freezer for about 2 hours (for much faster jello shots). You can also put them in the fridge for about 3-5 hours.

Recommended serving size is about 2-3 Jello Shots.

Usually, I have an extra cup or so of Jello shot mixture. Use a Jello mold for the remainder, such as Christmas Reindeer.

xx,
Kim

Grammy exclusive from Pretty K!

AWESOME SHOW! We sat in the 5th row, sandwiched nicely between Snoop Dogg, Nicole Kidman, Keith Urban, Lil Wayne, and Emily Proctor! Others in our immediate section included Quincy Jones, Jason Mraz, Adele, Sugarland, Jay-Z, Ne-Yo, Will.I.Am, Caleb Speir, Coldplay, Kanye West, and Jamie Foxx.

Fashion wrap up: Nicole Kidman's fashion was a bit disappointing. She's blond, pale, and yet she wore a pale gold dress that completely washed her out. Botox and collagen all about the face area. She appeared pretty, but artificial to behold. Emily Proctor was beautiful in an Isaac Mizrahi grey dress with orange details. She also loved my fascinator hat! Miley Cyrus did not look her age, again, yet still looked amazing. Taylor Swift was squinty but super cute and age-appropriate during her performance. Estelle looked lovely during her performance in a sequin shift dress with pocket detail. Her other dress that she wore at the beginning of the evening was just a little too silvery-robotic for my taste, but she still managed to pull it off.

Lipstick, ladies. It's called lipstick. And it seemed no one was wearing any! Nude lips everywhere. As of now, I'm calling the "strong eye, nude lip" a dead trend. I mean, if you're going to wear makeup, put some color on your face. Lips are beautiful things that should be abundantly featured on your face, especially if you have nice ones. Bronzer is still a good idea, and I recommend Lorac's full range of spray bronzers, blushers, and body bronzing lotions. I saw amazing faux tans last night courtesy of Lorac.

I wore a dress of my own design and making to the show. I chose to make a heavily sequined silk chiffon floor length gown with gold silk detail. For makeup, I worse MAC's lipglass in "Warning!" with Sephora's lip gloss in sweet berry to enhance the mirror-gloss finish. Fake lashes, gold eyeshadow, and a thick slick of Stila creme eyeliner completed the ultra-glam look.

Sadly, Josh didn't win in his category - Song of the Year for "American Boy," but we had an awesome experience. We briefly left the main hall for some hot VIP action on the other floors of the Staples Center. Later, I found myself backstage in the restroom with her d-listed, ginger highness, Kathy Griffin. Sharing a laugh at the sink, Kathy was personable, gracious, and as funny as I expected her to be. Outside, we saw the end of the night parade of Mayor Villaraigosa leaving the Chairman's room, Green Day, Radiohead, Kanye, Allan Thicke (Robin's pepaw), Carrie Underwood (very, very, very buff!), and a very giggly Miley Cyrus.

After the show, we went next door to the official after party. Tumblers descended from the ceilings above the dining areas much to the amusement of everyone. The Time and Robin Thicke performed to a well lubricated crowd. After a 3 hour food-free show, the catering was a welcome treat for many well-heeled guests.

After the official Grammy party, we were off to the Interscope after party. Insane guest list -- Pharrell, Macy Gray, Paris Hilton & BFF, and Will.I.Am spinning, a massive throng of musical A listers.

xx,
Kim

Nicole image source.
Kathy image source.

DIY Grammy Dress!

What more natural place for an LA Pretty to go than to the Grammy Awards with my Grammy Award Nominee boyfriend on some idle weekend in February? Which I am doing. This weekend.

I devised in my head how to avoid nip slips, keep my Spanx from showing, and the best handshake to give starlets wearing full body makeup. I went to Melrose to window shop, perused Cavalli at the Beverly Center, and inhaled the radiant awesomeness of Jimmy Choo. I envisioned myself in all manner of glitter, sparkle, bling, and Swarovski.

I looked at my bank balance. I backed the fuck away from anything plastic in my wallet. I realized then that the little voice in my head telling me to do this sounded a little like Tyra Banks talking about her love of the 99 Cent store.

Dolce & Gabbana starts at a wholesome $2,995 for the dress I want. Love the cut, hate the fabric. Custom Dolce was going to run me $7,800 or better. There was a solution to my problem. This Solution is called the Los Angeles Fashion District.

Spread over over 20 square blocks and de facto sectioned into the Upholstery Walk, Children's Wear, Menswear, Up And Coming Coutrier, California Mart, Never Ending Prom, Designer Prints, Beads and Accessories, and the Santee Alley. The Los Angeles Fashion district is flanked by the Flower District to the North, East LA to the East, Downtown to the West, and the Warehouse District to the South. Anything in the world that you can possibly imagine that can be manufactured, machined, shrink-molded, glittered, feathered, or encrusted in diamonds can be found here.

Fashion District + being a costume designer's daughter = DIY LA Pretty!

Be resourceful on your LA Fashion District trip. Bring a friend and a camera! This is good for two reasons: company and strategy. When you see a fabric you like, take a photo of the fabric (with flash), and a photo of the card from the shop. This way you'll remember the price, place, and look of the fabric you loved and avoid walking up and down the streets. Don't buy the first fabric you see that you like. You are more likely than not going to find another slightly more awesome fabric for cheaper at another store. Monday - Friday are the best days to bargain with the shopkeeps. The district collectively closes at 5pm, so don't be late.

Knowing how to sew, or knowing someone who can is key. The most amazing dresses are the simplest ones, i.e. few cuts and slices in the garment. You can find a number of inexpensive seamstresses in LA by asking around the district at fabric stores. They know their customers best, because they sell them their supplies. Take a community college class (LA has at least 30 or so community colleges and technical schools for $26 per unit!) in basic fashion sewing. It will go a long way! FIDM being in the District guarantees you'll bump into some current students at the Michael Levine LOFT. Go there, make friends, and get tips.

If you're not down to make your own dress, the women's apparel stores will sell you one. Just know your measurements, since you can't always try them on. If someone asks you to pay over $300 for a dress in a downtown wholesale/weekend retail store, you are getting ripped off. $200 will get you finery to the nines. Lie to your snobby Upper WhateverSide NY friends and say you're wearing rent.

After getting an amazing set of fabrics for my TWO Grammy dresses, my friend and I beat it for The Griddle off Fairfax.

LA Pretty DIY tip: Keep your fabric flat, Jack! Fold it flat in the bag, store it flat (or hang it) at home. Before you sew each pattern piece, IRON it. After sewing pieces together, IRON. Before you put the zipper in, IRON! Before you wear it out, get the garment dry cleaned and pressed (for finer fabrics). Steam it at home if you can't dry clean. The difference between obvious DIY dresses and couture is how they fit and the details.

xx,
Kim

Introducing: DIY Pretty

We are calling this State of The Pretty to introduce a new member to our Pretty team: Pretty Kim! She will be giving us her insights to all things DIY along with fresh LA Pretty perspective. We are SO excited to have her on board. She is a child of a costume designer and an amazing writer with a wonderful sense of humor!

Stay tuned for upcoming DIY Pretty tips and more postings from our newest Pretty!

xx,

The LA Pretties